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Shoes... - Mark's Journal
beeeej earlier shared a link to a Craigslist post seeking a roommate situation in San Francisco. It's hilarious and worth a read on its own, and I tweeted that if I lived in San Francisco, I'd want the guy for a roommate... but... 8 pairs of shoes?!

paperdollrss commented that she'd "expect a grown man to have more," which made me wonder. Especially in the above context, where the guy's going to show up at your place with a car, two duffel bags of clothes, a guitar, a laptop, and a cell phone, the eight shoes just seems out of balance. But how many pair of shoes do I have? I'll be liberal with the definition.

* One pair of all-season suede Lands End shoes [A]
* One pair of grey Lands End sneakers worn regularly [A]
* One pair of black dress shoes that hurts the backs of my heels [B]
* One pair of black semi-dress Dockers shoes purchased for London [B]
* One pair of beige suede Birkenstock Arizonas in decent shape. [C]
* One pair of black leather Birkenstock Arizonas purchased in Tel Aviv. [C]
* One pair of flip-flops on sale at Old Navy, for beach or pool

[A] In cool or winter weather, or when it's really wet out, I mostly alternate these for daily wear.

[B] Depending on dressiness required, or amount I expect to walk, I wear one of these for fancyish events like weddings, religious services, places I know my mom would be appalled if I wore Birks.

Wonder if they have these Birks in my size...[C] If it's above 55 or so, I'm wearing Birks instead of socks and shoes, if at all possible. The black Birks get some amused looks when I'm otherwise dressed up, but they're actually pretty presentable, and if women can wear sandals with formalwear, then, dammit, I should be able to, too! The beige ones aren't in as great shape, so I try to wear those if I know it might be rainy or I might get muddy. (Grassroots, for example.)

That's all the active shoes. I have another (older, worn but serviceable) pair of sneakers in my "go bag," the overnight bag kept packed with stuff I'd want to be able to grab if I needed to leave the house in an emergency. I have a pair of plastic Sanuk sandals I loved, but are broken. They could probably be fixed. At some point, I might also have discarded them. I have 2-3 pairs of fairly worn or damaged Birks that could be repaired or refurbished, and eventually I'll send them off for that. I bought the black pair in Tel Aviv because the pair I had with me had really worn-out sole treads, so weren't providing good footing on centuries-worn stone walkways. Those should otherwise be in decent shape and just need resoling.

I've also got a pair of old Timberland work boots, suitable for hiking, chopping trees or firewood once or twice a year at a friend's place, etc., but I wear them so rarely that I don't really count them as "active." And of course a pair of hideous khaki green upper-calf lined rubber boots that are invaluable when there's more than six inches of snow or so. If I'm going to be outside for a long time, especially shoveling snow, I'm wearing those, and my feet are going to be warm and dry.
17 comments or Leave a comment
pixel39 From: pixel39 Date: August 18th, 2011 02:30 pm (UTC) (Link)
Alas, it has been flagged for removal.
mhaithaca From: mhaithaca Date: August 18th, 2011 03:00 pm (UTC) (Link)

Tragically so. It was a funny post about how this guy wanted a place to live, wouldn't take up much space, would cook and clean, would gladly play the guitar and sing, go see movies, etc.
pigglet27 From: pigglet27 Date: August 18th, 2011 10:02 pm (UTC) (Link)
It worked for me.

$1000 Best. Roommate. Ever.

Date: 2011-08-18, 3:39PM PDT
Reply to: hous-ughzv-2549849730@craigslist.org

Konichiwa bitches. Are you looking for the most kick-ass fucking roommate that ever lived? If so, look no further. You fucking found him. I'm a 25-year-old professional marketing agent with experience at bad-ass companies in New York Fucking City. That's right! What you know about experience? I graduated from Auburn University in Alabama, and moved to NYC at the ripe, tender age of 22. After deciding that New York was a stinky shit-hole, I moved back to Alabama to cultivate more professional experience. Why? So I can make millions of dollars and not have to post shit like this on Craigslist.

Anyway, so I landed this job with a marketing firm in San Francisco, and I have no fucking clue where to live. Honestly, I'm moving there in 3 weeks, so I don't give a shit if I have to sleep in your bathtub.

A bit about me: I'm respectful, quiet, clean and I won't bother any of your shit. If you leave shit out, I'm just like, "Oh fuck I better not mess with this shit, because it's not mine." I turn off lights. I clean toilets. Fuck it. I'll even cook for you. That's right! My dad is a chef and taught me everything there is to know about cooking southern cajun cuisine. I'll fry green tomatoes, cover them with marinated crab meat and smother that shit in bearnaise. EVERY. GODDAMN. NIGHT. Don't eat meat? That's fucking FANTASTIC! I'll make a zucchini and yellow squash carpaccio that will knock your fucking socks off.

I also read a lot. I fucking LOVE books. Vonnegut, Palahniuk, Hawthorne. All that shit. I read Tuesday's with Morrie the other day. It's a sad story, but I learned something about life, love, knowledge and the pursuit of something greater than myself. Fucking smart. Do you like movies? I fucking love them. We can watch the shit out of some movies together if you like, or go get drinks, or work out, hike, play video games or play a game of one-on-one basketball, or I don't have to talk to you at all. It's completely UP TO YOU!

Sometimes I play guitar. Are you going to love getting baked and listening to Bob Dylan and Pink Floyd? LIVE? WHENEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT? Of course you are! I'll take requests and learn any song you like, because I have the voice of an angel and the acoustical stylings of James Fucking Taylor. AWWWWWW SHIT YEA!

A lot of people ask me, "Hey, you're from Alabama. Are you racist?" And, the answer to that question is, no. I'm not racist or judgmental at all. I love everyone. I'm a secular humanist. I FUCKING LOVE PEOPLE. That's the only requirement to being a secular humanist actually. You have to like other human beings and want to help them for no other reason than they are human regardless of race, religion or sexual preference. WTF?!!!? Pretty fucking cool right?

I own almost nothing! I'm driving my car from Alabama to California in which I'll be transporting two duffelbags of clothes, one laptop computer, one guitar, one cell-phone with charger, 8 pairs of shoes, one picture frame, probably some condoms and a shitload of beef jerky and Pringles for the trip. Though, you can expect the jerky to be gone upon my arrival. Unless you'd like me to pick up some on my way into the city. See?! I'm the most considerate person you've ever met. I'm offering to buy you shit already!

Am I interested in your pad? You can bet my nomadic ass I am! I only require 4 walls, a ceiling and a floor to shelter me from the elements. Other than that, anything else will be considered a convenient plus. I'm taking being a roommate to the next level. Email me! I'll hook yo ass up with Facebook links, background checks, credit reports, phone numbers, resumes, references, awards, sexual history, pictures of karate trophies and a list of the top 10 women I'd like to bang before I die. If you want a next-generation roommate who consistently blows your fucking mind with awesomeness, then hit me up. I'm ready to give you money.
mistressarafina From: mistressarafina Date: August 19th, 2011 10:09 am (UTC) (Link)
I'd live with this guy.
sunnycrittenden From: sunnycrittenden Date: August 18th, 2011 03:03 pm (UTC) (Link)
I have...

- pink Chuck's
- turquoise Chuck's
- a pair of black, knee-high Doc Martens
- a pair of knee-high, brown suede slouchy boots with heel that are impossible to walk in so I've only worn them out once
- a pair of Mary Jane style Sketchers for the treadmill

And that's it!
jccohen From: jccohen Date: August 18th, 2011 03:17 pm (UTC) (Link)
I have... a pair of black sneakers.
prof_organizer From: prof_organizer Date: August 18th, 2011 03:27 pm (UTC) (Link)
Hee, I was just riffing on the fact that I couldn't tell from your tweet whether you thought 8 was high or low. I'm not sure I'd have expected the CraigsListDude guy to have more than two pair of shoes, based on what he wrote. But yes, I'd expect a grown man (by my own, entirely flawed, definition) to own slightly more than 8 pair.

I already tweeted that I'd expect a "grown man" (by the definition I gave you -- a suit-every-day suburbanite) --two pair of workout sneakers (because one should never wear the same shoes, particularly workout shoes, two days in a row), 4-5 pr. dress shoes (again, anticipating the kind of work wardrobe I envisioned), 1 pair of truly "formal" shoes, such as to wear with a tux, which (in my little mind) a grown man actually OWNS, two pair of "nice" casual shoes, like for going out to dinner with friends, and two pair of run-around casual shoes, like non-workout plain-old sneakers. I didn't really count things like weather-related shoes and boots only because, after two decades in the south, I've forgotten what real weather is like. :-)

I didn't even count Birks or sandals because, well, I'm not a big fan of seeing anyone's naked toes. :-) I wouldn't necessarily expect a guy to have them -- nice, but not required.

If your dress shoes hurt your feet, then they don't fit you properly. ;-(

if you wore Birks to anyplace formal, your mom wouldn't be the only person appalled, but anyone who knows you would forgive a fashion oddity even if you came barefoot, because you're just a fabulous and lovable human being.

BTW, what you see as women wearing "sandals" as formalwear comes down to two things. Actual sandals that college-age girls wear with dressy clothes because they have no sense of fashion, or G-d-awful expensive and largely uncomfortable shoes designed to replicate the visual appeal of a sandal. Sometimes, if something cost $150, or $450, or whatever, the fact that it's ridiculous gives it a permission slip.

All this said, I don't personally buy into 99% of fashion rules. Apparently, all the rest of the women in America had a meeting a few years ago and banned slips and hose, but I never got the memo. I'm not sure I've worn a high heel more than twice in the last five years.

But I'll part with a piece of advice my mom told me the first time I traveled by myself. She said, when in doubt, stick close to nicely-dressed men with well-shined shoes. They know where they're going and won't risk danger or damage. :-)
pixel39 From: pixel39 Date: August 18th, 2011 04:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
Yes, if shoes hurt your feet, they do not fit properly.

"Sandals" with formalwear depends greatly on the shoe. Are you talking about something like this: http://www.zappos.com/amiana-15-a0621-youth-adult-black or something like this:http://www.zappos.com/roxy-aztec-silver ?

It also depends on what you consider "formalwear". :-)
mistressarafina From: mistressarafina Date: August 19th, 2011 10:17 am (UTC) (Link)
The first pic is more shoe-like than sandal-like to me. It's an open format, but there's a heel and that changed the game. The second one is definitely flip-flop, which I don't think should never be worn in a formal setting. I don't care how much a flip-flop costs, it can never stop being a flip-flop, which is just about as casual as you can get besides being barefoot.

Clearly, many people disagree with the flip-flop opinion as I see folks wearing them in situations I would deem shoe-worthy.

Edited at 2011-08-19 02:18 pm (UTC)
sskipstress From: sskipstress Date: August 19th, 2011 02:21 pm (UTC) (Link)
What if the flip-flop has a heel?
mistressarafina From: mistressarafina Date: August 19th, 2011 05:47 pm (UTC) (Link)
Adding a heel makes it more shoe-like and thus elevates the status of the shoe overall. It becomes a sandal. The final decider would be what material and decoration is on the shoe.
kitchenqueen From: kitchenqueen Date: August 18th, 2011 05:48 pm (UTC) (Link)
Dude, you wanna know how many pairs of shoes I have? I don't even know. All I know is that if I come home with another pair of shoes, Jesse may put me out of the house. I did make a concession when we moved and got rid of 1/2 of my shoe collection. Now I'm nearly back to pre-2008 levels in my shoe closet.

I like my shoes. Do NOT get between me and my girly-heels, or you may get one thrown at you. :)
mhaithaca From: mhaithaca Date: August 18th, 2011 09:17 pm (UTC) (Link)

Hey, you can have as many pair of shoes as you like! (Sorry, Jesse!) But I don't feel the need to have a lot of minimally different sets of shoes, myself.
mistressarafina From: mistressarafina Date: August 19th, 2011 10:12 am (UTC) (Link)
Another person who loves shoes as much as I do. I try to explain to my husband that they're not all just the same black shoe, but he doesn't get it. Even after giving away several unworn pairs of shoes (didn't fit after I got pregnant), I still probably own 50ish pairs of shoes.
allyson13 From: allyson13 Date: August 19th, 2011 06:08 pm (UTC) (Link)
No heels for me. I've had foot surgery.

I do have several pairs of fancy shoes which I always manage to wear at the Banquet at IC. :-)

How many of your shoes do you wear on a regular basis, Teri?
aregulardyke From: aregulardyke Date: August 19th, 2011 04:02 pm (UTC) (Link)

I Have ...

1 pr lawn-mowing sneakers
1 pr work sneakers
1 pr knock-around comfy sneakers
1 pr rubber chef's clogs
1 pr Buggaboo winter boots
1 pr Dockers mens "nice" shoes ( brown )
1 pr Land's End Trellos for around the

That is all. No girly shoes, never !

allyson13 From: allyson13 Date: August 19th, 2011 04:48 pm (UTC) (Link)
Your post started me thinking about shoes esp since the uber-boss was at the call center for two days and we had to dress biz casual (painful to see some of our more colourful folks dressed up in clothing they weren't accustomed to wearing) and I had to scrape up some decent shoes (my feet haven't forgiven me still).

I really don't know how many shoes I have, but I can say that I have four pairs of sneakers :-)

Seriously, I'd guess 20 pairs or so, only three of which I wear on a regular basis.

Gads I'm embarrassed. :-)
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